The P.A.

A weekly address from Patrick Adams,
President of St. Louis Community Credit Union

America Relives 9-11 Tragedy

On May 9th, 2011, posted in: Uncategorized by

In the week just passed, I found myself to be even more introspective than normal.  It was a week that started with the announcement of the death of America’s number one fugitive. As a result of such news, I spent most of the past few days diving in and out of what 10 years ago felt like; a day best described as just “9-11.”

Looking back, I remember at the time attempting to get my head around the breadth and depth of loss heaped on the families who received the news of their perished loved ones.  It was almost incomprehensible.  If you were like me, you thought of the feeling you would have had if someone you dearly loved had been taken from you in such a way as to leave you truly broken hearted.  And then in that same instant you forced yourself away from such an intensely numbing thought because the pain was unbearable and the emptiness became cavernous.  The mental and emotional gymnastics were exhausting.

Fast forward to September 11, 2002.  It was the one-year anniversary of when an entire nation collectively sighed over the sights and sounds of a year earlier.  There was little doubt that Americans everywhere would relive the tragedy in our mind’s eye without the help of a TV.  Yet, because of the round-the-clock coverage, we would have little choice but, to again, watch this tragedy unfold with painful repetition.

I was preparing to leave town that day and was watching a memorial service on TV.  They were reading the names of those who perished during the attack on 9-11.  Near the top of the list, I heard them utter a name – my name – Patrick Adams.  In an instant, I stopped and I remember making an audible gasp.  My heart sank and I stared with empty eyes at nothing in particular.  I was somewhere, but it was not on that couch.  I never heard another name.

I’ve often thought of all those nameless families over the past 10 years, and never more than these last few days.  I’ve thought of no one more than the family, friends and co-workers of Patrick Adams.  He was a security guard at the Fuji Bank located on the ground floor of one of the towers.  I’m sure he is missed.  I wonder about him regularly.  For his family, I feel quite certain that there is always a smell tucked away in a breeze, or a lyric in a song, or the spinning of a phrase that may have been one of his favorites.  There’s always something; there always will be that something that never lets you forget.

There have been a number of references by those who grace the airwaves and are paid to ramble that the surviving families of those who have lost a loved one must feel a sense of closure because of the death of bin Laden.  No, not really.

I assure you, as someone who lost my mom 35 years ago, there is no closure.  There may be less of a hole, it may even be as small as the eye of a needle, but I assure you it never completely closes.  I remember my mom lovingly, and I have not forgotten Patrick Adams.

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